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Website debunking the Special Assistant 
for Gulf War Illnesses
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Updated: July 8th, 2020
Come join our Organization as we face down the agency that lies about 
Gulf War issues. Deployment Health Support Directorate
1995 - 20,000,000 Gulf War military records declassified
1996 - 6,000,000 files given to OSAGWI to put on website
1996 - 1,700,000 files are medically relevant
1997 - 42,943 put up on website
At a cost of $150,000,000 less than .007% of the Gulf War Military 
records have been declassified for public release. 16 years later 
99.993% is classified , and the Pentagon has vowed to reclassify 
these records. This include Confidential Records that should have 
been released at the 15 year mark.
On February 14th 1999 I sent OSAGWI a FOIA asking for the bulk 
of its records names be declassified, and sent to me. I received a 
partial reply from General Vesser in a box with 2,877 pages, and 
two CD's. On the CD was the Structured database file and other part 
was a unstructured file. Again, only of the 42,943 files on the 
public server. In the Nov 5th1999 response letter from OSAGWI to 
me they explained they were processing the classified portion of the 
log sheets for me. That was the last I ever heard from them on paper 
concerning this FOIA. It remains mostly unanswered to this day 
on the other 6,000,00 files.
OSAGWI database file of 42,943 files 
OSAGWI response to me concerning partial response to FOIA
The Pentagon hides behind Executive Order 13292 so that the bulk 
of what happened in the Gulf remains hidden from the public. Except 
this is criminal intent to withhold information of neglect, misconduct, 
mishandling, and much worse during the Gulf War. The very same 
people who say nothing happened are the ones with full knowledge 
of those records, and vow to conceal them at all cost. The same people 
who lead us back to Iraq again under false terms, and created yet another 
disaster to live down.  
There should be FULL public disclosure, and we have the right to know 
what really happened in Iraq from 1990 to present.

How to complain to Veteran Affairs about your health care

July 8th, 2020

Texas will reach 300,000 cases by July 16th

Feel numb with these case rates, and wish this was going any
where but up. Governor is dragging his heels on locking down
the state hoping the locals clean up on there own. He doesnt
get the level of awareness isnt there to do right by this.

What is implied here is let the idiots go on licking door knobs
and finish themselves off. Which is what they are doing so far.
Granted some folks its purely accidental, there are others that
go out in public bent with hate and plans to be nasty to others.
Lots and lots of those.

Day after day of watching this parade of stupidity go on and on.
Cant make people do what they cant grasp. The Feds dont want to
try to save the 1% messing this up, as the bulk of the smart folks
are trying to stay away from Covid. Seems deliberate now on both
sides of this battle. Only, this doesnt go away and it comes back
in other ways. Total isolation isnt even sure bet any more.

I cant visualize a year from now, as its just too weird. I can make
predictions, but this all took on a silly over tone like its a game
and people will laugh it off. People are doing worse than I say they
will and the comic nature of it is not funny at all. Till the death rate
goes up another digit. Its not real? How real do you want this.

July 7th, 2020

The 10,000 cases a day mark in Texas

I had a feeling they would try to pad the numbers a few days before
reality set in. Certain counties numbers didnt change for 3 days
that were hot spots. But, I was off only by 3 days on my prediction
of hitting 10,000 a day. More like 10,028 after 2 quiet days. Then
suddenly McClellan and Bell counties go 100 a day each.

Its frustrating to gauge this because mortality is not matching the
infection rate. However, what people forget is this thing lingers for
months in folks. So when winter comes those that never quite recovered
slowly succomb to complications over time. The idea of herd immunity
has been shot down as this thing reinfects quickly.

Ive had a assortment of conversations with folks around me in the
local towns. The smart ones all get that August will be hell on earth.
That people are milling around like cattle, behaving like cattle, and
there going to drop like them in mass. They cant be saved because
the mindset is so backwards that this has to run its course as the lower
IQ folks prove there bullet proof.

By this point Im numb, and tired of the stupid people running a muck.
4th of July was such a show of ignorance and defiance of everything.
Really, was worth dying to shoot fireworks and splash in the lake.
People really made sure to infect all the lakes, water sources.

Its everywhere, and by now I suspect 1 in 4 are infected along major
highways and metropolitan cities. Thats conservative, as I think its
really more like 1 in 3. 10,000,000 or more already in Texas. Summer
heat is masking it for now. Cold spell soon will be fatal.

Americans really have regressed behind most of the world, and now
we are drifting to 3rd world status. I had kind of thought this for years
but now peoples actions speak volumes. As people are rushing to
speed the virus chaos up. Daring it to get them.

There were many times when I thought the local stupidity was very high,
out of proportion to the national level. Now I see this is a national thing
and that its getting worse. What I should say is, its getting more obvious.
But, getting people to do what is right or show any morality is a lost
cause. Mostly monkeys flinging poop at each other more than intelligent
people saving there communities. Which will be really ugly as the
gun fire escalates to the wild west levels. The fake Christians and
other snake oil salesman misdirecting efforts.

Its a real dyed in the wool collapse of the country and infrastructure in
slow motion. Total lack of originality or ability to see beyond there reach.

Depressing? Im dark? I have to survive in this future that since the war has
already been hell for me. Been fighting for my survival for 30 years now
and its not getting easier. People dont care, and now Covid is going to
make it nearly impossible. None of this is good news for me. So why
try to play it up or down. It sucks. Humanity is in a nose dive and
ignoring common sense. Im not eager to follow it down the rabbit hole.

July 4th, 2020

The personal freedom to self destruct?

The Covid pandemic has gone on long enough now to dull peoples
senses, and the "never do wells" to get very over confident. So you get to
see that nasty American attitude growing in a real tangible public way.
Defiance, arrogance, and open stupidity now push the daily exposure
numbers in a bizarre direction. The Lemmings out there are heading
over the cliff and want to drag the world in with them.

Yesterday I tried to get certain items in Waco, and it was a horror show
on so many levels all day long. Stores mostly didnt have what I was looking
for, pawn shops are wiped out of everything, and people were being way
more rude than normal. Cashiers have burned out. Road rage was silly.
Fast food places didnt have most of there items. All the places I used to go
to for surplus anything were gone including Mrs. Bairds. Then throw in the fact
that stockers and store staff kept taking off there mask as they worked
at every store. It went on and on as the hours dragged by.

Well, to me the message is very clear - the rest of 2020 is going to be so
bad its not funny. America will show the world just how stupid it can be
and throw away its riches just to be petty. It got too easy to survive and
they think it will stay that way. Destroy 150 years of work to make it better
and safer, and push us back to the mid 1800's.

The only saving grace now is herd immunity, and if enough develop some
form of tolerance to the virus. Because the effort isnt there to control this.
Then again, a lot of these folks shouldnt make it if there going to dare it
like throwing Covid parties. As people are not used to death in America
and dont see it enough to fear it. Not like in third world countries where
bodies often lie in the open and people ignore them.

Until suffering is universal, things will only get more detached, and ugly
as people dare Covid to get them. Those hard wired backwards that
seem to want to fail at life. Which now looks more like the Millennials
having a go at it. I guess they have a purpose of sorts. Its the backward thinking
folks working against survival worried about being entertained that we
dont need to make it anyways. Well, let nature do its job and weed them

If everyone here could see a year into the future, this all would be so
completely different. A few months is a big difference. Instead its some
from of hillbilly hell that makes no sense to the smart folks. Im sure the
CDC right now is going nuts, and the WHO is just barring the doors for
a scene out of "the walking dead". By now people are throwing there hands
up and saying "I quit' every where. Only, quitting in mass.

I fought in Iraq in 1990 for America, and since then Ive had no rights and
treated like garbage. For what, so the 4th of July most everyone can throw
this country away over one more out door barbque? I resent this so much.
All the hard work I have to do to make up for others that wont. To piss the
country away they take for granted. Its most of the way there now, so much
I cant get any more thats gone - gone. The small businesses that folded
and services that wont come back because supply and demand is shutting
down. Variety, selection, quantity. The quality of life that wont recover for
10 years or more.

Will take about a year for most everyone else to catch up with where I am on all
this. Long after the fact. The prophetic and diligent that did the hard work
only to be ignored. The Gulf war crowd never gave me credit for being up to
10 years ahead of the others on ideas and predictions after 2005. Im not a
idiot, nor a radical. But, I do expect results and most dont.

Humanity is in a tail spin, and all the wrong people in charge. Will it survive
itself or does someone push the nuke button to finish the job. This 4th of
July set the tone for the rest of the year, and its all BAD.

Had predicted 192,300 on July 1st for the 4th. We hit 191,790 today. So
I overshot by 510 cases total. However, case rate today was 8,258 which
was highest day yet. Averages out. Its not declining over all.

July 1st, 2020

Too late now to stop or slow this

Texas shot to 8,076 cases today. Its pretty clear to me that people cant
see the obvious in front of them. Not just that, but people are running
out spreading this on purpose as well. Those mean little characters out
there that spend every day looking for people to screw over. Which right
now Texas has way too many of. No shortage of that.

The numerical progression now hit a 6 fold multiplier, and you can bet
that Texas has more than 4 million infected right now on the way to
10 million very quickly. We may hit 10,000 a day by July 4th. I had said
about 176,200 by July 4th, thats now July 2nd. Im saying 192,300
by July 4th.

Notice the differences. Im being conservative and the numbers are running
about 9% from me. Which means all my projections are not even
worse case scenarios. Im being the harbinger of doom and yet Im running
slightly below what it really is. People are worse about this than I am just
by there actions. Stores, gas stations, banks, and ATMs leading the way.
Privacy curtains at ICU's.Touch touch touch.

Fools, Texas is full of fools. Not taking any of this serious as we approach
numbers way beyond what can be controlled. Its time for total shut down
of the state and the governor blew it waiting this long. As the 4th of July
in itself will push this over the edge, and only because people demand
the right to go out with a bang. Pisses me off that the stupid will destroy
and decimate Texas because they cant handle a little isolation.

Is it the heat? Is it that too many people cant control there hygiene? The
mask are not doing it, this is a contact sport. Hands people. Stop talking
about the damn mask and keep your hands in check.

Ive managed to reset my disaster clock once more. Buy a little more time
and long term resources. As there is a good chance the new stay at home
order will become martial law, and everyone is quarantined here. Which
if that happened this would all be over in 30 to 90 days. They wont do it,
until the horror show is a horror show.

If more were like me, you would have set aside enough to ride out 6
months or more of this cut off from the world. There wouldnt be a panic, and
there wouldnt be shortages. Too late to shop once the whole thing is
forced shut downs. Which so many idiots out there kept thinking would
not happen. Living on the 3 days national food supply rather than getting
real serious. I so deeply resent how much inconvenience I have to endure
because others around have no clue what reality is. That simple solutions
existed if people had taken them, its not simple any more. Its all after the
fact and tanking hard.

July 4th celebration? Now a deadly holiday that will become taboo once
its iconified with death. The holiday that pushed Texas into a hell hole.
Boy, are you people in for a rude awakening on preparedness. As the
damn carriers literally become plaque zombies of a sort walking around
looking for others to take down with them. You watch, people are that
shitty in this country - Ive seen them at the stores practicing already.

June 25th, 2020

Over confident and spiraling

Today Texas had 5,996 new cases at 3 days in the mid 5,500
range. Waco right next to me which had done well up to last week
lost control this week. Its no longer a safe Metropolitan city. Bell
county below me surged past 1,009 as the reconsider the summer.

CDC finally admitting today things could be a factor of 10 or more
unreported. Im still saying closer to near 200 than 10.

Its no longer safe to shop for groceries or be out in public. Ive
started the disaster clock when my car finally died yesterday
and wont shift into 2nd any more. I had made the car last since
February when this started and today nothing else worked to get
it out once more. Its on its way to a wrecking yard, worthless now.
Did the impossible with it to shore up things though for 4 months.

Ive watched the shipping industry slowly plummet into chaos.
Packages now are rotuinely lost or circle back and forth for
weeks in limbo. They cant keep reliable staff, sorters, and
drivers. I knew that once this folded the real hell would begin.
As you cant get things like you used to. The last 2 months
Ive tried to get a few remaining items to shore up the place,
like a special backup AHD DVR that went into limbo for a
month. Had to order another to replace that one. Fedex,
UPS, and USPS are unreliable in a pinch. Ive had very disturbing
phones calls with them. Pitney Bowes is a horror a show for me.

Next week July 4th will decimate Texas, and send the spike past
the 10,000 cases a day mark afterwards. Pushing Houston and
Dallas past the breaking points.

Exponential curves now, my predictions about August being
hell on earth fast becoming reality. Going out to work or shopping
will get you killed. Today when you touched a gas pump, keypad,
or door handle - you came in contact within 2 hours of a Covid
person who just handled the same. Viable virus on them. Your
mask did squat for that. Where are the damn gloves?

America being out smarted by something with no brain, that
says alot about the kinds of people out there. Arrogant, snide,
and willing to kill others once they know they are infected by
spreading it. It was allowed to spread. Americans were NOT
willing to do what was required to contain this. China knew that.

The bad part is, the medical industry is now wiped out from
the last 3 months and the real spike is about to over whelm
a severely depleted resource. The mass graves will start
in Houston and Dallas soon.  All because financial pressure to
shore up the rich is worth sacrificing the poor to do it.

Covid might not kill so many out right, but as it erodes the financial
industries and commodities - those will be as bad long term.
Those that didnt stock food reserves now may simply find stores
closed that cant keep stockers and cashiers.

Your all counting on the kindness of strangers now, and you dont
get that you burned everyone around you with apathy. There wont
be kindness in the coming months. You get what you give, and dont
complain when its your turn. Just know if you survive the next year
you wont take things for granted like you did right now. By July 2021
people will long for the days when others were kinder. As you will no
doubt be 20 lbs lighter and a whole bunch less cocky. Only, its part
of a 10 year stretch that will sky rocket suicides as they years pass.

Im a student of human nature having survived a war. I dont have the
luxury of taking things for granted. What people did to me as a veteran
all these years prepared me for this. The huge double standards and
pure mean spirited narcissism out there has been appalling. I know
how low people will go because they already did it to me the better
part of the last 30 years. Its how I can be so dark about all this. Its
why Ive been on top of this all the way back to last September. Trust
no one, and count on no one. Not even family.

I cant even picture a year from now, because its too dark even for me.

June 23rd, 2020

Texas lost control of containment

There you have it folks, left to your own - cant wait to go out and
show how quick you can spread this in Texas. The opposite of
smart on so many levels out there. Honor system? Youve got
carriers infecting people on purpose and wandering jerks who
swear they dont have it while licking door knobs. It most certainly
is a reflection on American society. Being careless will cost you.

Today hit 5,489 new cases in one day. The stupid took this as a
personal dare to out do New York in daily rates. Mask dont work,
its the gloves, and contact surfaces folks. Touch touch touch.
Then they go digging for nose gold. All those gross personal
habits people deny they do. Ugh.

This is too easy to predict, because it relies on people being at
there worst and defying everything. "You cant make me". That
should be on the tombstones in the mass graves areas as there
official names.

Only reason Im not panicking is the death rate is lower here for
some reason. The infection rate does not match the death rate.
Which sounds like warmer weather is masking the asymptomatic
as symptoms are too mild. A plus for now. Then again, its also
keeping doors open too long out of false hope.

My prediction rates changed radically to match the new numbers.
As we will hit 10,000 a day much sooner than I thought. Now the
true numbers games play into this, and the incidental exposures
reach 4 digit multipliers. 10,000,000 exposed in Texas may have
already happened and it will take a week to really watch this
surface. Im still running about 189 to 1 on reporting numbers and
those still standing but coughing.

I dont think this is 6% mortality in warm weather. Not sure we will
reach 1% this summer. But, Covid lingers and reinfects. Come
October we will see the death rates spike vastly. By November this
will be the darkest winter America has ever seen. Way too stupid
out there to realize this wasnt worth the risk.

So far, this is all cattle milling around. Herd isnt spooked yet. That
comes later after the July 4th mega spike, and the following weeks
as the death rates begins to pick up speed. Figure that we will hit
176,200 by July 4th. 56,000 climb by then at least.

Talking about over confident idiots leading idiots to there doom.
Mutated virus with all kinds of weird new factors that keep changing
on us. Mostly, the fact it seems to love heat.  Dont care what you
say folks, this was engineered. No normal patterns with this.

Sooner or later, it will pick up the right set of genes from a infected
person carrying another virus it borrows from - and this thing
suddenly has much higher mortality rates. Mutation and the
number of generations it builds on in hours.

Humanity is playing with fire, and its loosing. Then again, we dont
need the stupid to survive this. Your licking door knobs, its your life
your throwing away. I wont miss you. Im just worried about how many
smart people we loose due to proximity, and if we loose too many
of the ones that could save this planet. In 3 years we wont be giggling
about any of this or wondering what went wrong. Survival will get
much more serious by then and not so much entertainment driven.

June 20th, 2020

Denial on many levels, and stupidity reigns

Today was the highest Covid rate yet in Texas, at 4,430 new cases - you
can tell that things went south. 5 days at 4,098, 3.129, 3,516, 3,454, and
today at 4,430. This is not a 107% increase, its a 353% increase just
from June 15th and its over 5 days. Not a fluke. Im using spreadsheets
to track and verify what others wont including counties around me. What
is sad is things are even faster than my predictions rates. I said 100,000
by June 21st, and we hit 103,305 by June 19th. My county to county
predictions have been plus or minus by 2 people a day.

So saying we will reach 142,300 by June 29th is probably low ball.
But, no need to ham it up. I get it what is going on here. My 90 day
projections are frightening though.

I watched a lady at 99 only in Waco lower her mask to sneeze in
the store. Of which I promptly left. Confronting her is a waste of time
as she is a carrier trying to infect people on purpose. Monsters.
People like that are the lowest life in America.

Much like the local idiots, people are as dumb as they can be like
some great force will set all this right. This is sad only because the
death rate is so low in contrast. 25 people out of 4,430 that died.
Still puts this at .005% which isnt horrendous in itself. Its that mixed
message that keeps the idiots out in public. We dont have the bodies
stacked up like they did in New York. Mass Graves.

So the obvious will happen any day now, processed foods will test positive
for Covid. Then the rush to over react and over respond.

Im glad this isnt the horror show I expected by late June, the reduced panic
and markets are giving me extra time to round up more last minute
items when the real disaster clocks kicks off. As I can tell you peoples
guards are totally down now. Oh, its not real or its not that bad. Only,
the shipping companies have begun breaking down. It finally caught
up with them.

What is real is the predatory behavior of the jerks out there that
think they are bullet proof. The road rage and act general acts of
cowardice are exploding. This will lead to the sales of car DVR's
as people find the law not on there side. Law is only out there protecting
the rich and the criminals, victims are on there own.

Mathematical progression is slow and quite sinister. Only when the case
rates blow past 10,000 a day will Texas put the brakes on public
travel and works. By then its already too late to slow this. Because
by then your looking at probably 10,000,000 Texans being silent
carriers. Not reporting out of fear, contempt, indifference, malice.

Which is better? To be ready, or be caught off guard? Yet, look
around you and what people are doing. Ambivalence. Until after the
fact. Its either comical or super sad.

Now look at your history, and weeks before so many great tragedies.
The division of the classes and choices of behavior during hardships.
In every scenario, it was mob rules, and then 40 years of nothing or
more. The resentment carried over past the break downs and those
people canceled out all forms of progress. Made sure no one got
ahead. Its not just the event, its what follows it when people carry
grudges. It was revenge upon revenge past 75 years or more.

Im preparing for what might end up being extreme isolation. As
this has all the earmarks of a global purge brought on by arrogance
for nature itself. She is getting ready to bitch slap humanity and
things just have to happen that didnt need to. One thing Ive learned
in my numerous hardships, never say it cant get worse because it
can and will. Law of averages has never been fair to me. What you
should be doing is preparing for the possibility when the law of
averages fails you as well. When your 5th and 6th backup plans fail.
Ive found you need 3 to 5 of everything in a crisis, and even that
might not be enough. Well, if they dont make or sell it any more -
then what in a panicked market. Bet you love what your paying for
paper mask right now. Ive had NBC, hazmat, and positive pressure
mask much less a box of crappy paper ones.

Not much intelligence out there, wait till it gets real rough. Being
stupid wont save you then. Thumbing your nose and treating your
neighbors like crap is about to back fire globally.

June 16th, 2020

The second Covid wave is real in Texas

Despite effort to play the numbers down, they couldnt hide the
infection rate for long. Today it went 89,103 to 93,206. This is
a reported 4,098 case rate increase in one day. The one two
punch of reopening the state too soon and the riots. Which
is the opposite of progress.

County by county is not the issue, its the Metropolitan areas
that living side by side keeps this alive. Closing down shouldnt
be everywhere, just in hot spots. The big cities that wont check

This is a game to people, and its a really dumb one. Going out in
public to see if they can push there luck for entertainment sake.
Bars, clubs, restaurants, and other places counting on a honor
system with idiots.

Puts the pressure on people like me to double our own efforts
to avoid the ones that apparently one to die being stupid. Not
that there is a short supply of this in America. I deeply resent
that the intelligent have to work twice as hard at survival because
the morons think there bullet proof spreading Covid that probably
know they have it. "Got to get to church", they wouldnt dare
spread it around there. Like that works. Same fake christians
putting on airs they arent as bad as they think they are.

You would think the numerous stores with empty shelves would
be a daily reminder. I was stunned to see how stark Academy
was these days. Maybe entertainment, maybe survival. But, it
was weird to see fishing supplies wiped out.

Reality is reality, and trying to color it or explain it with distorted
views doesnt make it fact for others. Too many think Covid wont get
them because it just wont. Like magic. At no point do I go out
and pretend its not there. Im on my guard as much as I can be
with contact surfaces. But, now I have to really be on my guard
because reporting isnt reliable. Where are the real hot spots.

Numbers keep going up, and that is real. Slowly, this keeps on going
as we creep towards fall. When the first cool blast sets off a explosion
of cases out there. With it firmly embedded in every corner waiting
for ideal circumstances once more.

The stupid have become very stupid, brazen. They need to go lick
a door knob and get it over with. Nature is moving too slow with them
as she apparently wants maximum casualties with this one. These
are the folks that will keep Coivd very much alive beyond normal
life span. Till half of us are gone like during the black plaque.

Entertainment will kill America. Those that cant handle a little isolation
to stop a nasty virus are a threat to the public at large. What could have
been over by now is slowly boiling away building up speed.

July 5th will have been 3 months since I said that time duration the
world would be very different. Its even more so. The global infection
rate isnt rampant, or the death rate - thats what is so sinister about
this. Wasnt complete downhill slide. Recovered some, and people
went back to chewing there cuds in the grassy fields. Much like
cattle the reaction of the 2nd wave will be like cattle too.

This should have been about getting ready, hunkering down, and
taking this more serious. Now it has to be much worse till its as
universal as it can get. Like walking the streets of Hiroshima at
the end of WWII, and its too big to even take in what just happened.

Im embarrassed by this country. Reflects none of what I fought for in
Iraq. The rights of the stupid to ruin it for the rest of us. It wouldnt
take much to improve it, but it takes more than reverting to the
old business as usual that lead us here. Lazy.

June 12th, 2020

Missing the bigger picture

Texas had some spikes in the case rates the media
is playing down. May 25th looked good at 623 case
per day, by June 10th we shot up to 2,504 cases per day.
I predict we hit 100,000 cases by June 21st. This is
mostly metro areas with large populations, smaller
counties faring better. Dallas and Houston are bad.

Acceptable rate? Its going up, and now 4 digit per day.
How is this OK? Im looking at over 1,000,000 cases in Texas
just under the next year as we hit 10,000 a day. As right
now nothing is under control with this. Its not flattening,
and its not slowing.

By this time next years its at least 1 in 29 have had it
here in Texas. But, Im still pretty sure its 1 in 189 are
even being reported today. Way past 4,000,000 in Texas probably
have had it and its silent numbers. Which plays down the
severity of it and lethality. Mortality maybe lower than they
really know other than in metropolitan cities where its more

What is the plan here? Go out and ride this out? See who
can survive this? The rich with private doctors? Because
since March the only help Ive seen hasnt been, and if
anything its just harder in every way with even less.

The message I get from all this is: "All lives matter, just not mine",
and Im real tired of it. Plenty of assholes out there but not
civic minded folks with serious local plans. People are really going
to wait till after the fact on this, and be shitty all the while like
things went back to normal when there not. God its stupid
out there on the roads. So many morons.

Rebound? Are you all really stupid enough to believe that?
Stop using that word. Its a bounce, and on its way back down
in August. The dam is still spewing water, the cracks are
spreading, and we have people saying its fine when its about
to burst.

This country is on fire, and too many want to throw gas on it and
say its under control. Sociopaths at the helm of the ships if you
ask me. Open the country back up? I didnt agree to that. There
is a lot I never agreed to, and Im sick of it.

June 7th, 2020

Misdirection and Posturing

All this howling and bitching to correct a smaller issue
of a much bigger problem is diversion of the worst kind
at a pivotal moment of the infection rate. Because all these
people expect to be cared for by the health system when
there about to over whelm it way beyond before this. Then
what, you didnt help fix that or give them a chance to recover.

Lets sum this up, you want a honor system with law enforcement
and society when you just did millions in damage. Do you get
the irony of American apathy, and that the bulk wont sign on
for this - there going to carry a grudge like you do. Too many
practice "do as I say, not as I do". Pretty much most are busy
plotting there revenge every day rather than stop the "two wrongs
make a right" scenario. Especially the fake Christians like
out by me. Huge double standards. Go out all week doing harm
and then expect absolution on Sunday for going to church. The
death bed confessional types that did a lifetime of harm.

You cant have a honor system if your just going to go out and
thwart it because some part of your subjective reality says its
alright as long as you get them first. Believe me, Ive got some
drugged up monkeys out here that go back to flinging poop at
the first sign of anything territorial to them. Pillars of the
community? Nope, its a complete failure of society as people
regress 25,000 years thinking that will save them. They dont
get embarrassed, they cant perceive what is wrong as they
are hard wired to fail on many levels. Perception is the major
player here. People dont fix problems, dont get involved, and
wait for imagined revenges. Look at the middle east. There
number one thing is revenge for 4,000 years - legendary.

So we have a class war going on, and rather than change it
people want even more double standards. Because after this
your gagging and tying the hands of law enforcement. Till
America is like Mexico and the drug lords rule everything.
There waiting down there to cross into America and take over.
They dont respond to zip ties an pepper spray.

At the height of a pandemic, with no clear leadership, people
are still going at this wrong. Which is why alcohol sales are
through the roof. Entertainment drove the cry to reopen the country
and its that same short sighted behavior that is making it all
worse. As you have too many with no focus, nothing to live
for, dont get involved or any civic interest, and see everyone else
as wrong but them. Pretty much ex-con mentalities more than
a great nation looking out for the global good.

Living a lie comes on many levels, and so many turn to self medication
like booze because reality sucks to them. Well, grow up about it.
If your miserable, its 90% self inflicted. Better wake up to that before
someone with a gun points it out to you. As people reduce to violence
and dont care what justice or reality is. Got to fix yourselves.

You want grudge matches, you've got 10 years of everyone canceling
everyone else out. No one will escape this. Its bad human nature the
last 4,000 years and its repeating all over again. The dialogue has
reduced to monosyllable chanting, and the reactions will be that
in return because you expect from others what you dont give in return.

Go do some civic rebuilding, save your grocery stores, help a farmer
save there farm. If nothing else, go clean your neighborhoods up and
stop waiting for others to do it for you. No one is on that bus. I learned
that one in Germany long ago, they have civic pride, and sweep the
roads rather than trash them. Each chips in.

June 6th, 2020


When did survival become such a back seat thing these days.

Im trying to wrap my head on perspective here in Texas. With the
total population at 29,000,000 and 73,553 cases of Covid - the
infection rate as reported here is less than 1%. Its like .0025%
which is a quarter of 1%. That is since March and this is June.
Numerically, this is nothing. But, its numerical progression and
its speeding up. I think that is why people have gotten over confident
about it. Till it finally reaches like 6% by fall.

But, did we fix the infrastructure or farm belt? Did we re-employ
22,000,000 Americans? Did we save all those people that were
broken by the shut down? Seems like the rich geared back up
and declared victory. Dow has almost recovered. Over what?

So the over confident are running out like normal is back, and
now its all about going backwards to what was. Throw in all
manner of social chaos, and so far the reaction is anything
but fix Covid. What is it going to be like in 30 days after the
infection rate explodes with all that were rubbing elbows?
Does Covid become a tool for dealing with civil issues?

In fact, Covid has a taste of minorities and its not driven by
politics or race. Being angry and stomping around in public really
just makes you much more vulnerable to a already sinister virus.

Seems like there are going to be many forms of brutality to come
from this on all sides while people seem to loose focus. Maybe
Im a little singular, but Im more interested in fixing each problem
as they surface like the disease running unchecked.

What Im seeing locally are shallow ignorant people who see the Covid
crisis as a opportunity to mess with others. Doesnt matter what the
truth is, they dont need to know it, its what fits there subjective
reasoning which is completely un-civic. Well, they also dont get what
"the rest of your life" means - that they have to live with the behavior they
think isnt monitored. The dumber the person, the more obvious they
are about there ignorance - and of others. So its a real circus around
me of brain dead morons that bother everyone around them, and the
weed is clouding there minds to reality. Im so thankful Im not like
any of these bottom feeders and can see the bigger picture in a
much grander scale. I also dont have to lower myself to the antics
because its quite boring. Same applies on all levels nation wide, when
your all done out there spinning every which way - when does this
become future goal oriented. Is police brutality right now really as
bad as Covid? Couple of zeroes missing from the other. Tie the
hands of the police? Boy, does that sound sinister too.

This is all as I expected, and people are as short sighted as they
could ever be. Till after the fact. Makes that distractions to real
survival. Priorities are such that there not survival driven, and when
they are its not national interest - mostly singular. Education, common
sense, moral and ethical codes, and a laundry list of other sad confused
facts being turned into myth / opportunity. Mystification.

None of this will end well. Its mob rules on many levels, and with a
huge amount of folks that dont see 90 days in front of them. Just
demonize whatever you can, deify what you can, and wait for God to
solve it? Way too many confused hippocrites, fanatics, zealots,
opportunist, and no real long term leadership. Reactionary, not
methodical in a true social way.

The collapse is very real. Its not future tense, its past tense. Now
it happens in slow motion as the circumstances catch up with the
each person. What you did today, and was it really logical? There
are so many folks that hurt themselves, and like with radiation the
reality comes after the fact as well as dose level.

Can you really afford to live a lie? Most will find out they should
have used objective rather than subjective reasoning.

June 3rd, 2020

Pointless riots, distractions, and a evil undertone

People are itching for violence, but because of the overall level of ignorance
its unfocused anger. Take it from a old protester pro back in 2003, you dont
stand a chance without a leader to force points at the table. We didnt have
that in 2003 and troops went to Iraq under false pretenses. Wasted 2 trillion
dollars and created the Taliban as backlash.

What we have right now is the army of one jumping on to the mob rules
train, and ready to bail once the money runs out. They are going to wait
you out, bleed you dry, and pick you off one by one as you go back to the
lives you think you had. Only to find your now enemies of the state and
with red folders, to be driven into the ground the rest of your lives. You had
your chance if you had chosen to do more than memorialize one person who
wasnt a public figure head or champion of humanity. That wont win over the
other 85% of the population that wants no part of this.

What people have done is destroy there own areas, long having forgotten
the LA riots. Businesses dont come back, and everyone carries guns.
You dont poop where you eat. What did you gain? Did you sway public
opinion or just turn everyone off that your not going to focus above just
simple civil disobedience. Pick your battles folks, but with a exit plan.

All the while Covid spreads, and it whittles away at the poor. A bizarre
hybrid virus that seems to be quite specific about its minority taste.

Forgotten is the farm belts, infrastructure, and others that are decimated
now.  The big rush is to drive up oil prices, and get those rich people back
to skimming us all dry. Grocery stores are using brand substitution to
stave off fear, but we dont have product to replace what was lost. The goal
is to slow all this down enough that people settle into there new reality
slowly rather than shore up commodities and infrastructure. The Republicans
must cash in, and manifest destiny dictates god chose them to survive and
\the rest are in there way. Not that the Democrats are doing any better right
now to fix it either. A broken party system cashing out with sad belief systems
and obscure ideas rather than fresh insight..

Idiots are out in force doing what they do, serving base desires and not
planning to help anyone other than immediate quick fixes. This is long term
survival in jeopardy and no quick fixes will work. In fact, its really a sad
free for all out there heading to civil war that doesnt need to happen. As
most dont know suffering and human cruelty like us combat vets. None
of us vets are spoiling for pointless combat. Especially those that did 4 or
5 tours in the middle east. Where the daily hatred ate you like a cancer,
and living in fear turned to numbness of your feelings.

None of this will turn out well because there really isnt a moral code or
true ethical value system in play around the world. People can hide behind religion
but you kind of get by now that no one seems to be showing up to reign
any of this in. Which was how people like Hitler rose to power. People ignored
him and allowed him to build up, drug there feet, and then found out after the
fact it was a BIG mistake. American apathy almost ruined the world. Then it
cost us dearly to catch up and fix it.

This is divide and conquer of what is left, not save humanity from itself. Slowly
becoming enslaved states that need the government to dole out food to them.
Where the stupidity and short term thinking hidden behind apathy back fire
into 40 years of chaos. Until people think small, and rebuild what is right
around them. Start from scratch and carry a huge grudge that will last the next
100 years. Punishing all the things that lead to the last crash. Look to your
history folks, this isnt new - and its been really big 5 times over 4,000 years.
The biggest one leading to the 1,000 years of dirt.

Im super disappointed with humanity, and right now Im very bitter about how
others intend to ruin my life with indifference. Im on top of things, and with
enough sense to ride out all kinds of scenarios. Im not some panicking person
clucking about. Im ready to fix, rebuild, and keep this from getting worse. Im
not wanting this to get worse. Its way bad enough now and going down hill
each month. But, out here no one truly helps no one and Im watching the
parasites casing who they plan to screw over. Backwards, its all backwards.
The stupid are in charge, and it will end badly for all.

May 28th, 2020

Opened the country up, and just when it had stabilized
over 5 days in Texas the rates tripled the last 2

It was looking good by last Friday, infection rates were down and the weekend
had hope. Then all the stupid drunks, idiots, and so on felt the need to swing
things out of control. Sure enough, took about 2 days to show that it was too
soon to let our guard down. Rates tripled on us. Damn it.

41,000,000 without jobs. Thats a huge amount of anger, despair, and people
looking for revenge.

The term "food insecurity" pisses me off. Nice way of saying hungry people living
in fear. The double speak terminology to demonize the poor and make this a social
class issue.

Now its time to force social media to not correct misinformation, when
did that ever stop people before either way. Opps, bad approach folks.
Now things went full constitutional.

The stupid people didnt wake up, and now the real bottom feeder personalities
out there being more crappy than ever. Really? Going to bother people and
frey nerves in a federal emergency? No sympathy, and none given when
its your time folks. Starve, succumb to Covid, wrap yourself around a poll,
whatever. We dont need stupid people to survive these days. You Lemmings
are not part of the future and America doesnt need you. We need problem
solvers and community leader types that are trying to save there areas - not
feed never-do-wells bent on ruining all they touch.

Stores are doing substitutions now on products as they buy from other
sources, and try to keep fear at bay. Only, there is no way to fill the
supply gaps that have become permanent. Will take time to soak in
the kinds of shortages that will be long term. It all has to happen after
the fact and way too late to fix.

Got your TV celebrities hiding at home doing feel good broadcast from
there bedrooms. How insulting, cowardly, and boring. I dont want to
see you in your homes rubbing in how your waiting me out. Youve got
plenty, comfortable, and bored? Boo hoo. I havent been to a barber or
salon in 2 years, and it was $5 at a beauty salon school that I gave up
on. Ive been roughing it long before any of this set in and I cut others
hair better than the salons. My daughter knows this and her mother.
Im not hiding. By the same token, Im not licking door knows either.
The mask wont save you, gloves and germ-x will.

Self reliance folks, you better get with it. Write off humanity and start
getting real handy at home. Im already doing medical procedures and
its not fun without lidocaine injections. Going to a ER can get you killed
for something that wasnt lethal. Ever cauterize yourself? You cant flinch
and just give up.

Then only people right now doing better are the rich, and there only
skimming off the top of what is left. There is no plan, and the trade off
is being in the public with the sneezing assholes who will bring down
the businesses they infect on purpose. You know, the jerk that gets right
up on you in line at the store rather than back 6 feet. Always saying "I
dont have Covid" as if that make it right - they wont be honest about it.
Thats why they are standing right by you.

This isnt a game, and those that are playing likes its a game are
not long for this earth either way. Then again, looks like nature has
to run its course and these genetic throw backs swimming at the
shallow end of the gene pool will drown in 2 inches of water because
there too stupid to know there drowning. Common sense is in short
supply and survival was too easy for the last 3 decades. Now its
mob rules till everyone kills each other in the mosh pit.

Well, Ive seen enough to know what to do. The fake Christians and
other assorted snobs have written us all off. The bottom feeders are
racing around pissing on everyone. The tiny number trying to save
the country are hopelessly out numbered and burned out. This is
going so badly out there. Im very angry at what this is bringing and
it didnt need to happen. Then again, I guess it did. Covid was just
the right straw to push this all over. Only, now people are going to
know what I knew  - what the smell of dead bodies are like.
The war taught me that, and now the war is here I guess. Seeing
your first dead body lying in the road. Maybe that will wake you all up.
When it gets so bad they cant keep up with them. Mass graves.
Who wants to lift up a bloated purple body that died of Covid?
No one will volunteer for that, and the bodies stack up. But, no way
to stop this crap now - numerical progression will make it real later
this year. Our children will know true horror this coming year.

May 13th, 2020

As global community sees the 2nd wave of infection
start, America makes the mistake of opening too soon
kicking off catastrophic doubling of cases

I had enough sense to know we needed months of more isolation to deal
with the random aspects of nature. Cool wet spring and early summer is
a breeding ground - not time to let up. This is going to be so bad as the
case rates in Texas doubled overnight.

If your doing a bar graph, and its going up at a certain rate then the
projection isnt hard to gauge. Double the case rate and you double the
numerical progression. The line just goes straight up now. But, my math
still stands at a 1 to 189 case rate reporting. This is a wild fire out there
with a near invisible flame. Fauci wasnt being over cautious. He cant say
enough about unknowns.

People still dont get 2.5% food inflation isnt the real number, its a easy
temp number to keep people from panicking. Supply has broken down
and soon it will be much more obvious. You cant fix it after the fact and
it wasnt taken serious. The few being honest about the upside down
nature of the supply system have been quickly drowned out. You cant
use the head in the sand method on something that has never happened
before. Youve got to triple efforts for unknowns

As the weeks roll by, businesses run out of steam and fold. The try to
reopen only to find COVID on there doorstep and stupid people more
than eager to screw everything up. As we head in August more than
half the small business industry is permanently gone. The nest eggs
dried up trying to ride out 6 months of nothing. But, this will take down
the bigger entities as well that bleed much faster. Until all that is left
is necessity businesses, and barely at that. Selection is fading as
monopolies take over or lone survivors.

You cant be selective, and pick and choose who you want to make it
business wise. The virus and market is so random that you need to
spread out the chances of survival. Instead, we have so many assholes
out there trying to be picky at who they help. You also have the low
lifes still trying to disrupt others. Nothing good natured about any of
this. More wrong than right, and its a disaster as the petty rivalry ends
up killing both sides off. Competitive? More like cut throat.

People like myself that have been betrayed for years see at how easy it
is to devalued, find that this double standard out there will kill others
with no survival skills. Rather than be taken serious, people dont
get there level of there own apathy thinking others will help them.
I know how low people can go, including family. That this is far
from over, or reaching the real lows yet. See, I know others can be
much crueler to my own hardships - and they will do it to others
once they think they can get away with it. You dont have the best
people int the world watching over you, you had thieves in DC cleaning
it out heading to there bunkers. There going to leave you for dead
like they did us vets at the beginning of April.

This all has to run its course, let those naive enough to think anyone
cares end up dead counting on things that arent there. The best suited
to ride this out are the homeless, they have the skills. But, they
also counted on surplus which is gone. Your going to see some really
ugly things as those that didnt plan go wild to hang on. Might as well
be in the heart of Iraq in the war, as the behaviors wont be different
as the stupid think something or someone will save them. Too many
with there hand out and not thinking long term. Its going to take extremes
to survive all this and false hopes are everywhere. The floods are here,
and not near enough are filling sand bags.

May 10th, 2020

Your kidding, right? Open the doors and declare all
is well while COVID numbers skyrocket

You can tell that people dont get science, math, and other basic concepts
sed on the last few weeks. Mostly, because its been so long since a
real global disaster the scale of this escapes them. Only those of us that
live in hardship take it serious because we cant afford to ignore it. As I
watch people daily plod along in happy ignorance. All will go back to the
way it was. Really? That much denial. See it every day.

No one seems to be doing graph projection out there, and follow
the numbers. Its a straight line, and its way too early to be letting our
guards down. Only because right now not everyone knows someone that
dies of this virus. By late June that will be very different. August will be
misery and hell on earth numerically. Just do the math. Now add that
its a very cool May, and the virus is building up speed rather than cooking
in summer heat.

As for the markets, it cant support 71,000,000 unemployed and the
collapse of big business later this year. In the great depression the
population was 121,000,000 with 20,000,000 unemployed. We are
at 331,000,000 and will be 3 times as many without work as the
depression. How do you feed that many when production has all
but stopped and agriculture has collapsed. Where is the tax base
if money isnt coming in like before.

Then throw in the selective process of who has gotten help and
who hasnt, and it feels sinister. I can tell you right now, Ive gotten
nothing and especially the Stimulus money. That has become a
major sore point because there is no effort or concern for vets much
like those in retirement homes. Hurry up and die in silence so the
rest of us can make it. Rest of what? This is a culling that only will
be more wide spread as time goes by. If it can be done to some,
it can be done to most. By the same token, the apathy driving this
will be universal soon. Cant have a double standard and not think
it cant be done to you. It will, no one will escape this. Those that
got hurt first and survive will only make it worse for others. Humans
carry grudges to the grave.

The most stunning part to me is the cavalier approach to the
agricultural crowd. We should be protecting this like its gold
because it is. Our truly most important product of the planet
far out weighing oil or any other trade. I take this deathly serious
only because I live on 3 acres and cant grow enough to support
myself. 15 years of practice, and every year the variables change
so much I still loose most my crops. Im not automated, and it
takes money to automate. Throw in bad weather, insects, animals,
and so on and this is scary stuff. Almost no one out there is prepared
for how hard this is. Throw in that it cant afford to fail now and you
really have a nightmare. Youve got to scale up scale up 3 fold
from any projections to allow for failure.

Gas prices hit $1.46 locally, a price I havent seen since 2000.
That is a true marker of a reality check, and how far everything
will slide soon. Only, we may not even have a airline industry
by January next year. Might become a federal entity as they
stock pile aircraft from failed corporations. Consolidation is the
new buzzword rather than growth model. We wont see any
economic growth the next decade as this decimation isnt even
in check yet. Cant even project till numbers stop climbing.

Until everyone is thinking long term for real, and learning to
ride out a year in advance - people will die by the millions.
The days of sloppy surplus are gone, and terms like buffet
will be forgotten. Oatmeal will have a whole new meaning to it.
Rice is too hard to grow, oats you cant kill if you try. But, good
luck steaming it and rolling it out. Both need processing.

I imagine the main source of transmission right now is door knobs,
door handles, and people picking there noses. Gross as it sounds,
careless activities that now are deadly. People trapped at home
that still get sick. It also in the water supply, hiding in the iron bacteria
slime in rusted pipes. Will take them a while to figure that one out.

I can go on in a hundred different ways how bad all of this is
going to get. Only, no one is listening right now and they wont
till failure is life and death. Cant make people care till they are no
longer comfortable. Hardship seems unavoidable. Only those of us
already living this are vaguely prepared, and people like me that
needed that surplus out there just to shop cant afford to loose it.
With everyone turning to that now, it will be gone for good soon.
Once price gouging and spikes kick in, we may loose most of
the stores as well to looting and arson. Food trucked in by
armored military support to be rationed. Then the real cruel games
kick in as jerks start playing god with that.

You folks allowed this, and ignored any chance to reign it in. You
cant fix it unless you fix yourselves. Starts at home and being
serious about survival - life. Then, you better get real about which
way your moral compass points. Not the public one, the one that
looks you in the mirror. If your not sincere, your going to fail. Bluff
and cruelty dont hold up in a crisis. You could cheat people a little
while, then they will revenge upon you soon. Better get with the
fact that your isolated and if you dont care then neither will your
neighbors. Right now, its just mutual assured destruction as they
will cancel each other out. Its not life threatening just yet, that
is the next few months when its REALLY not safe to travel.

The stories of human cruelty have not kicked in yet, and the coming
months you will find out what I already know. As the truly shitty
people strike out first, and show us all how warped there thinking
is. They plan to take us all down with them, and these are
drowning idiots that will drag us all down with them. Steal, shoot,
screw people over. All the stuff that breeds hatred and mistrust.
We have along recovery ahead just trying to get past them. In every
great calamity in history - it took 40 years to get past these kind.
They make sure no one gets ahead. Up to 75 years in some cases
as there children only perpetuated there parents bigotry. Till that
nagging neanderthal gene gets weeded out by evolution.

April 20th, 2020

Its a melt down of society as we know it, and too many
people still dont get it how serious this is

Im truly stunned at how low people have gotten around me. You would
think that people would rally or wise up. Nope, the stupid, drunk, doped,
losers out there are busy pissing off everyone around them. Boy, do
they not see the writing on the wall. Too many manual laborers that
cant find work now. My 22 million unemployed prediction is now a drop
in the bucket. There wont be any spending soon, as the dollar suddenly
drops to penny value. Oil already went negative, below zero.

Not only am I seeing no help, but Ive been robbed of my stimulus
among other things. Its a free for all as I knew it would be and people
are acting like being cruel wont back fire on them. Im being driven
into the ground on all sides, and people act like "whats your problem"
because its not them. It will be soon enough. Im done explaining
myself to others. No one is fooling no one long term. Im seeing new
lows every day as people sink down further. Giving up morals in favor of
petty behavior. Talk about people checking out of this world in mass
soon. Lemmings, little more than and too many.

Im not crying Armageddon, its not that unique. This is a world of petty
ugly people feeding on each other right now, and not seeing the future
even 6 months out. As no one is raising, storing, or trucking food then -
its vanishing by the billions of tons including seed stock as we speak.
There not harvesting or trying to save it folks, and come summer
its too late to replant. Food prices will jump 1,000% shortly with all the
farms that went under every day. 4% farmers in America, we dont have
enough to loose like this. Better learn agriculture and get those buckets
going. Victory garden? Survival garden. Texas is NOT a good place for
one of those. Too hot.

Then comes the 2nd COVID wave, as the fools let people out that have no
place being out. You dont think for a moment all the scumbags and
crack heads wont be running out trying to take everyone with them.
The 2nd wave will be much worse and much bigger till it runs its course.
This one will be ugly, and more obvious heading into August.

How can I say all this? Because based on what is happening to me,
its going to happen to every one soon. Im just one of the first because
America finds it easy to do this to veterans such as myself. They
dont get it how ugly it is, until its them too. Im not seeing kindness
and Im really getting bitter about what its like for me already. Mostly
because the attitude out there is, "do for me first and maybe I will be
nice to you if its big enough". People have spit on my gifts as they
arent big enough and I dont have more to give. So Im done with that.
Eggs can rot in the compost pile.

Top down economics has failed, and now its tumbling wildly until
others catch on the rich lost it all too. The contraction is full under
way and accelerating. Once when they admit the Derivatives market folded
completely, is when the banks announce they have nothing. Then
all the 401K's vanish, and all stocks go zero.

Folks, you dont want me to be right about any of this. But, you also
ignoring me like Im wrong - and Im mostly one up weeks ahead of the
curve month after month. Common sense stuff, and I knew people
would be at there worst when it mattered. For me, its a life time thing.
Just stating what I think people will do based on what they do to
me all the time. Humans are awful and its about to be very obvious.

I wish it wasnt this way. But, I knew it was coming and people dont
do whats right till after the fact. Nature wont forgive that. So go on
trying to fool nature, and think that it will all go back to the way it
was soon. Its never going back, and for 10 years its going to be
hell on earth till folks wise up. Till they come to grips with that mirror.
Most wont make it because its too hard to make the transition to
my world. Denial will kill them quickly.

Remember folks, the people that survived concentration camps in
Germany did so by being useful, and never pissing off others. You
better to be willing to do shit jobs and not complain doing them.
The last people alive where the ones throwing bodies on the fires
and staying out of the way. Ego will get you killed.

Maybe it wont get that bad, but so far I dont see it getting better.
Bad mistakes, huge ones, global ones. I see 3 billion dying in the
next 2 years based on peoples behavior as of today. Till folks learn
to turn off the attitudes. Most will learn that as they die.

Its too late now, and the domino effect is in play. Each one is bigger
than the last, and the ones in June will ripple the ground as they fall.

April 5th, 2020

3 months from now it will be a very different world

Never a prophet in your home town.

So much has happened, and now the worst is here. I say the worst
as its happening in slow motion as well, could ramp up in ways that
others will be shocked by. But, venturing in public in rural Texas is
no longer viable option. People are not taking this serious.

Keypads at stores, gas stations, and such along major highways
in metropolitan cities are ground zero. If your not wearing nitrile gloves
then your very wrong. Mask is of no value. Surface to surface and
hand to mouth. There are no quarantine fail safes in place.

Stupid people last 3 weeks are not going to make it. There is so
much arrogance and ignorance running amuck. Cant kill the virus
with a gun folks. But, keep firing and a stray shot might find you.
Smart people arent pushing there luck in a national crisis out
drinking and shooting like this is normal.

Its out of my hands now, Ive warned who I could and tried to
reach people about common sense ideas. Now the pathogen is
every where here and not worth being out in it.

I predicted 6 million unemployed a while back, Im now predicting
over 20 million. With 44 million finding out the stimulus packages
isnt there for them. Im no longer going to give death tool predictions
are its just too dark. Wont help people now.

Not trying to be a alarmist, but I damn sure have a better idea of
what is to come than others. People dont want to listen. Then dont.
Use what information you do have and make your own choices.

Ive got plenty of ideas, methods, and tech to offer. What Im finding
is much like back in the war, the wrong people are in charge and they
make bad decisions that hurt others. Mostly out of arrogance. Folks,
your playing with lives and those bad decision do not spark confidence
or compassion. This isnt a joke. mistakes now will have dire fall out.
Ignoring my experience is just sad if I could save lives or hardship.
But, that didnt happen in the war either. They didnt learn and lived
out of dumb luck.

Im not putting my life in the hands of morons after the Gulf war, so
looks like all I have left is last man standing. Didnt have to go this
way, but humans by and large never learn till after the fact. Millions
have died needlessly in history for it. I wanted to help and found
myself spurned by those that simply dont know better. Its your lives.

March 22nd, 2020

Global melt down on very slow scale, or made up threat
to play house keeping with society

You would think a virus with a few hundred deaths is no big deal
considering 15,000 children just starved to death today. Every
day. Boy, big double standard when it might be people who want
to live no matter what - and there not helping people who need it
more or maybe deserve it more. The innocent, the young, the future.

Shelter in place? Its been abandon in place. Social media? That works
great if you have a normal family, friends, and life. Those of us that
live with hardship all the time are not fun to play with. Medical problems
drain you mentally, physically, and financially. Throw in the government
demonizing Gulf War vets and your trapped in a vicious circle. Family,
friends, and other left us long ago to go enjoy life - entertainment. Its
boring helping someone living with long term medical problems.

Its every person for themselves, and the shelter in place order really
has given people carte blanche to be even more calloused. No health
and welfare checks that Ive seen out here. If anything, the drug thugs
and ex-cons have been out casing peoples homes sizing them up.
Testing the waters. The opportunist certainly see a chance. Ive been
saving the video footage to give the sheriff of the vehicles in question.

More and more this all looks like a chapter out of "V for Vendetta"
with the potential plaque and the coming miracle cure. As it doesnt
come off like genuine disaster with the nature of this. Its rough, but
this isnt Ebola killing millions here in gruesome way with dead lining
the streets. Seems staged, as the powers that be were too afraid to
release mutated small pox or whatever. Keep in mind they did long ago
when it came to societies they wanted to crush, like tainted small
pox blankets. Come back to bite them.

What your doing out there people is creating great resentment from the
poor, the sick, and disabled that wont forget how you left us for dead
when this all kicked off. You may forget, but we lived it far worse off.
This will be etched in our minds that apathy ham strung us even worse.
The run on the stores has been very frustrating, and its number one
product of choice is certainly a reflection of people out there - toilet
paper. Personal comfort. Big red flag. ( leaving the pun alone ).

Its a break down alright, buts its a break down of society as it reveals
its true nature in a crisis. That most are insincere, indifferent, and that
they live by double standards. Fake religious, political bigots, racist,
fear mongers, opportunist, hate mongers, and so on. Now is there chance
to get back at such and such, or not help people they hate for imagined
reasons. That or turn it all off, hide at home. It will go away if they ignore it.

People building walls, and there walls that wont protect them if things
go mob rules. Once its mob rules, vigilante justice is wild and blind.
Its more motivated by dark base instincts and cruel opportunity rather
than any real justice. That will spread like wild fire more than COVID-19.

Ive been focused on building, repairing, and fine tuning my place to wait
out a long stupid miserable chapter in America. Observing others and
see what they do right now - as this was the real them all along. Most
noted, how silent it is. The 85% of the population that never do anything
or get involved that tricky Dick counted on before he resigned. The part
he feared was the 1% free thinkers he harassed and used government
agencies to verbally torture. Kind of see that is still in place. Keep
everyone else that dissents in check.

So far, all people have done is poison there futures. Lack of action and
then reaction. "Someone else fix this", "its everyone elses fault". Big
help you have been. Send out a email, there, we helped someone.
God will protect the righteous? How many people throughout history
died praying to that tune. Did that protect the indians and other cultures
as manifest destiny mowed them down. It was always who had the
better weapons, support, and opportunity to pray on the weaker.
Technology allowed for greater cruelty.

This is society preparing to clean house of those that are barely
hanging on just like it does with starving children around the world.
Only as the suffering builds, things wont swing the way you think.
Being lazy and thoughtless is about to get very ugly for all. No one
has the upper hand at the end of a global crisis. Better look harder at
that person in the mirror and improve some aspect of them. 100 years
ago mistakes were deadly, and daily life was much harder. Toilet
paper wasnt even common til 1935.

March 18th, 2020

Economic and pandemic chaos as people find out
being careless and apathetic can backfire

Boy does this remind me of the Anthrax letter attacks. There was no
plan then and when it happened civil service people got left in the dust.

I contacted post masters on the east coast telling them proper decon
for this situation. A bucket of clorox water and a pair of tongues. It was
that simple, dip the item and leave it. Not the crap they were told.

The post masters were betrayed, and people died that didnt need to
while house and senate members only looked out for themselves.
Then betrayed them after the fact by playing it down.

Now there is a panic with Covid-19, and it could be largely stopped
with a simple pair of nitrile gloves. Its been a hand to hand, and surface
to surface issue. Just like touching door knobs and privacy curtains
in a hospital ER. Yet, people run for paper mask that only concentrate
the virus in the surfaces of the paper. Then they handle the mask and
come in contact. Just stupid.

There has been a run on the stores. Horde buying. So what. If you
were smart and paid attention, you would have been ready and not
have to do this last second. In fact, there wouldnt be a panic of any
kind if more people were like me. Not be sloppy about day to day
life and run on luck.

American economy was fragile all along, as its purely based on the
top 4% making a profit. The rich were doing fine, the rest like me
have been struggling with 18% inflation. It wasnt ready for strike at
our largest supplier of goods, China shutting down. Then bring a
pandemic here on top of that to finish us off.

Unlike others, Ive been living a agrarian life trying to supplement
my shortages. America was mostly agrarian a 100 years ago.
Homesteaders and such that had to plan a year ahead. Ive tried
for years to get like that. So run on the stores would not leave
me high and dry.

While the crisis kicked off, local thugs have been sizing me and
my neighbors up. Screwing with people like there stupid. Only,
they dont get my security cameras have them in action. The low
life thugs and ex-cons see this as opportunity not realizing people
like me have spent years getting ready for this very moment. Its
time to clean the street up of there kind that thrive on misery.
Stupid people wont see it coming, Im not stupid. Im here to
protect the children and innocent, not criminals.

Schools are panicking on education. One is running to pay Google
classroom to give them a cheap alternative. Only, its not interactive
and lacks involvement. Told them about Adobe Connect classroom
and for 30 days its free at any scale. Could have saved them down
time, interactive stable platform, and been free. But, what do I know.
Im just a low life high school drop out with a GED. Not the creative
whiz kid that helped create a federal advisory committee with
literally smoke and mirrors.

People have abandoned me in place, and left me for dead. The
level of insincerity and thoughtlessness is not a shock. Just sad.
Yet, Im not worried as I use logic, reason, and skill to work
my problems. I dont look to others for guidance or input as
Ive spent years preparing on a level most never will. As I was
abandoned long ago for being a disabled combat veteran.

Im ready for something much much worse, like I was in the
Gulf War. Ive seen first hand how people behave in a life or
death crisis and its mostly bad. People think no one matters
and they can get away with it. That will kill America right now
rather than save it. So Im socked in as a prepper full well
knowing that the only thing I will probably see is people panic
and kill me for what I have. Was like that in Iraq, stole whatever
they could from me all the time. Till I fought back.

Another crisis is here, and people will show there real colors.
Im the only thing actually keeping Osage Texas safe and the
dumbass locals have no clue. As Im the only one that works
with local law enforcement and have freqs on my ham radio
equipment. Im ready for total chaos, and wont be a looting
scumbag taking everyone with them.

People dont think of the future or there surroundings. I do
every day. Problem is, Im the only person I know that looks
in the mirror and takes my own part serious. Cant afford
to live a lie, or be insincere. The day after matters as much as
surviving today.

Love being trivialized by the stupid. Im always under estimated.
But, living on stupidity wont work in America much longer.
Mother nature is about to up the anty and most wont make it
based of current reactions. Cant be lazy about survival.

Im going for last man standing, and let others find out on there own.
People dont want to learn.

March 1st, 2020

Oh yes, it can get worse and keeps getting darker
with each passing month

Well, its not a guess any more. VA has taken advantage of the
last of team work and involvement to take Gulf War under ground.

The new RAC now has phone meetings in private, and does the
bulk of its work offline so no one outside the committee can
oppose it. There making silent recommendations to the Sec of VA
that he wants, and keeping the veterans in the dark.

All they want now is give the illusion of talking to vets and listening
to public comments. Only, none of it goes any where. So the so
called subcommittee short meetings around the country parade no
real science, and it becomes about giving false hope.

Ive made all manner of suggestions, of which all of it has been
ignored even when I was told it had merit. Ringers on the
committee make sure only VA approved folks get any time
with the secretary if at all. In essence, its a shut out.

I got to see one internal email from the committee of what
is on the table, and how VA is trying to bring everything
back to the year 2000 complete with GWIC ( DOD Gulf War
Illness Conference ). All this is being guided by a DOD
Deployment health operative trying to bring back all the old
cliches and 1995 agendas.

Im stunned at how brazen the committee and VA has gotten.
As Im positive one member is helping the committee institute
methods pioneered by the GWVTF to keep veterans in the dark
and unaware of recommendations it made. Why be public or
have a science writer when they can make up whatever they
want out of view of the general public or veterans.

VA has only gotten more vile, and arrogant about it being
above any over sight. If no one can see what they are doing, then
they are not doing anything wrong? Transparent?

All the while my own healthcare has been crude, lowball, and
Ive had lost of bad luck trying to deal with basic problems.
Yet, colonscopy came up hot with multiple biopsies to include
excising a 12mm polyp. They played it down, but over 1cm is
considered high risk if not cancer already. Nothing about that day
went right. What was supposed to be a short procedure ending at
1:30pm ended up dragging out to 2:45pm. I had bruises and have
no idea what all went on while I was under. But, when they
wheeled me out I was bright red said a witness. Doesnt help it
took me nearly a year and a half to get the dam thing.

I have things like Vitamin D and Vitamin B12 deficiencies that
are obvious in the labs. Yet, no one says a thing. Unless I catch
it then it doesnt matter, but lack of Vitamin D has severe effects and
my lab was 25 and the scale is 29 to 100. Ive got these because
my GI tract is always inflamed, and diarrhea. Mal absorption is
kicking my ass. Even coffee mess with me. Down to mostly oatmeal
and trying vitamin supplements out. Some improvement there but
this isnt living if its just gruel all the time.

The bad part is the hundreds of heart skips and pops a day from my
GI upsetting my heart till 3 days ago. There is some kind of inflammation
involved as Ibuprofen helps, then it make my stomach worse. Cant take
pills that help one thing that upset another. Cant take pain pills as
they set off my pancreas. Which thing hurts the most and treat
that briefly. It sucks to have pain meds and cant touch them. Its
all old stuff though from years ago. I horde what I can knowing
VA wont issue over the fake Opioid crisis. Sucks to have surgery
and hold back on pain meds because you never know if you can
get them again.

My left shoulder has a torn rotator cuff, but cant get anything for it
till they image it. Ive been at 10 out of 10 for 3 months now on pain
scale, and they bumped my MRI as they cant use one machine
on Saturdays for it. So this drags out for 3 months now where I can
barely use my arm, and all I have are lidocaine patches that are
a pitiful joke. Finally, the MRI comes up on March 4th and my car
died so I cant even get to it. No backup and no one to take me.

Im miserable all the time, and now Im stranded here. Its so hard
to focus when your in blinding white hot pain. Yet, Ive got to fix
up a vehicle and get it on the road all by myself with no resources.
The car tranny is dead, and the van has severe electrical issues.
Up to me to solve it using my wits and duck tape. Well, Ive
figured out ways to force both vehicles to do limited task while
I nurse them along locally. Nothing more than 10 miles.

You would think people would be a little compassionate hearing all
this, not at all. But, I cant go into all of it and use names or risk
lawsuits. Lets just say people know when your down and think they
can get away with what they normally would not get away with.
I get that a lot here in Texas, as the word veteran really means
"dont bother me with your problems, mine are much more important".
Only, most of those folks are comfortable and forgotten what
real hardship is. They even go as far as to berate your suffering
when there biggest problem that day is to let the dog out to poop.
This is a sick country these days.

This is all just what VA wants to hear. People like me struggling
slowly bleeding to death in obscurity. No dealing with Gulf war
healthcare or benefits, let everything stagnate while veterans like
myself finally die off. Millions of records out there held back by
DOD that prove what happened to 7th corp in Iraq, and the
thousands of things that went wrong they still cover up. National
security my ass.

Sad part is Im right in the RACs face, and they plan to ignore me
and keep me from the Secretary of VA at all cost. Keep parading
there ringers, and giving VA all it needs to remain stagnate. Not
like the Congressional committees care either. The HVAC sure
has no balls with this topic much less the service groups.

There is no where to go, and Im not welcome any where because
I expect results and time tables. Im supposed to sit here quietly
and die because a tiny number of arrogant air heads want to make
themselves into heroes that will be thrown off the committee soon
enough if they dont cow down to VA. Like there predecessors.
Ive Waited 31 years now for any ray of hope on my health, and finding
indifference and masochist that seem to enjoy my pain.

To me, America has become evil about how it treats its vets and
most Americans seek to cause misery these days. Only, turn
about is fair play and those same people have no room to complain
when its there turn. Boo Hoo, thats not fair - hey, welcome to my
world. No sympathy when none is given. Ive had my rights and
freedoms robbed of me since serving in Iraq, and no one cares.
Right back at you America. Most of you dont appreciate what
you have and spit on too much. Blame others, and not see the
real problem right there in the mirror. Big double standards.

Kirt, your so negative. Hey, Im surrounded by it every day by
the ungrateful cowards of this country that spit on my rights
like there drug fueled drunk dope smoking asses matter more.
Good luck fending off the Chinese, Russians, or whoever steps
in soon - pull that on them. America is so busy pissing everyone
off that its not a matter of if, just when. I know better, but then
again Ive been in a war and you would think that would matter.

All I know is survival, and it sucks. Im already there, and most of
you could not survive in my world. To me, America is already a
3rd world country and lost sight of so many things. For the poor,
its already too hard now at 18% inflation the last last year. This
rich are out to suck us dry and drive us into the ground like in
the Hunger Games books. Expendable population.

October 17th, 2019

Say good bye to Gulf War in titles, VA wants to make
this into a generic title war. What else? Where do I
even begin

Since October 2017 I could tell things were going south even
faster for us GWI vets. Dr. Clancy and other VA execs blew off
my and other vets suggestions with the informal non-research
portion of the RAC meetings on October 30th 2017 and then
in a similar one September 18th 2018. With no paper trail, VA
felt it wasnt important enough to address.

Cant get the Secretary of VA to acknowledge GWI healthcare
and benefits needs. Total shut out for 2 years.

Then the RAC meets in California on October 3rd 2019, and it
was mostly bad news for us. The low point for me was the CDC
presentation on the Anthrax vaccine reactions. This was a really
badly done piece of science based on missing information and
a presidential waiver allowing them to misreport reactions. A
presentation like this would have been booed out of the room
10 years ago. Only I spoke up about its poor qualities. By the end
of the meeting I was so furious with the committee I went off at
the end of public comments about these folks being too proud
of what is there. That based on what I saw, heard, nothing would
come from the meeting that day, that month, that year, or 5 years
from now. Not to mention my pre-post genomic sequence idea
the chairman liked, and getting multiple MRIs matched up to
do digital subtraction of structural changes in Gulf War vets.

Found out the new committee isnt even posting public comments
much less written comments of vets this last years. Since February
when they started there road show. In fact, it cherry picked ringers
to meet in secret with Sec Wilke and keep the loudest voices
like me away from him and off his desk. Plenty of disturbing
comments from the committee to me of a sad monopoly
misrepresenting the issue in a pro-VA format and no paper trail to
show it.

But, when you really think about it. Over 17 years about 10 Secretaries
of VA have not implemented recommendations of the RAC that
werent forced through Congress. The CDMRP and the other
advisory committee ( ACGWV ) were done through Congress
leaning on VA. Outside of that, VA has blown off the RAC and
the ACGWV for 17 years. Which in my mind means the Sec of VA
need to be taken out of the loop if they cant act, and let vets
vote in provisions in mass for things they want from VA.

It gets worse.

Being over confident in there ability to play down the vets. VA decided
this year it would remove the Gulf War Review entirely, and lump all
the vets into a generic titled Military Exposures & Your health
newsletter. Get rid of the one last printed document with our war
in the title, and any form of statistical reporting with it. VA had gotten
rid of anything related to us in current print to write us off. This is
very much like the IOM report on ALS, when VA changed the title
from Gulf War to deployment in general to diffuse the numbers.

VA would certainly not do this to the Vietnam crowd, and put
Agent Orange Review into that newsletter. There would be a
massive outcry and pressure from the Big 5 to put it back.
Only, the Big 5 service groups dont care about Gulf War vets
and VA knows they wont rally for this one. Mostly as there is
no pressure to bring in GAO, DOJ, or Congress to look into
our plight the last few years. Government Reform and the
HVAC went limp on us years ago, and sit in indifferent silence
as no one shows up with any backing.

All the while, VA is unaccountable on Gulf war healthcare and
benefits issues. No dialogue, paper trail, and a gutted RAC
that wont raise a finger now its loaded with VA ringers. No
medical treatments, on real medical statistical reporting other
than pro-VA studies like the Millennium Cohort which couldnt
find a hang nail. Certainly no death rate stats, and no forms of
annual tracking that is public including rating claim rejections
rates of Title 38  ss3.317 which was over 92% years ago.

Im stunned at how brazen all this is, and how easily they can
ignore the white elephant in the room like me. The level of
contempt, apathy, and disconnect has reached a new high
that will certainly spike suicide rates among GW vets.

VA found its answer though. Wait us out, hope we die or
commit suicide and leave no public paper trail showing it.
Not just the vets, but spouses, children, and the people
who got the vaccines that got sick - including non-deployed.
Doesnt matter if I have hundreds of good ideas both research
and benefits. VA will ignore them and people like me at all
cost. Just leaving the vultures left on the hill to pick at
what is left till its gone.

Those that served need to speak up, and find a mutual format
to do so soon - before you cant get in a VA door at all. Looks
like they plan to start turning us away openly soon, and
ignore us like homeless people under a bridge.
      Kirt P. Love 
      Disabled Gulf War Veteran 
              Former member: VA Advisory Committee on Gulf War Veterans
      Contact: Kirt Love - ( Email updated April 5th 2020 )
                   P.O. Box 414, 
                   Crawford, Tx 76638

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The Desert Storm Battle Registry
P.O. Box 414
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